before festivities and drunkeness begin and nobody can be buggered reading blogs, happy new year everybody !!

after a month of staying here, mother informs me that my grandad's old laptop can actually be used, and that we have *shock horror* an adsl connection. prior to this, my @$#*(%& stinking rotter of an uncle told me that a password was required to access the internet *and* the laptop and he didn't know the password for either. now i must figure out a way to download msn.

using what limited resources i have, i've created an extremely rudimentary christmas card! merry christmas everybody =D

nicked from zoot girlie-tron

Favourites
favourite colour: brack. pink. purper.
favourite food: ice cream
favourite song(s): fat-bottomed girls and spread your wings by queen. lazy line painter jane by belle & sebastian
favourite movie: harvie krumpet
favourite sport: um. twister? is that a sport? i don't really watch or do sport.
favourite day of the week: a sunday without church. those are great and lazy.
favourite season: autumn
favourite ice-cream: ben & jerry's cherry garcia (an SLF staple!), or haagen dazs green tea

Currents
current mood: work is for schmucks. why am i here?!
current taste: lotus leaves
current clothes: a green dress that mum says looks like a house-coat but i think is cute
current deskstop: dilarang merokok
current toenails: au naturale
current time: 10.04am
current surroundings: office. surrounded by snacks and an apple.
current annoyances: 9 - 5ing. and this country in general.
current thoughts: nando's chicken, whether i should get a laptop, whether the cheque i got from work has cleared ... oh and also contemplating my future. deep huh!

Firsts
first best friends: my primary school partner. i don't think i was good to her though ... we don't really talk anymore
first crush: han solo (the shame)
first movie: i .. don't. remember *sniffle* probably some disney movie!
first lie: i didn't do it.
first music: whitney houston stuff! on a voicetape made by a filipino maid.

Lasts
last cigarette: at vie bar.
last drink (alcohol): white wine at the company dinner last night
last car ride: home from the company dinner last night.
last crush: shh .. cannot say! they might read this blog. and then they will know.
last movie: a battle of wits (墨攻)
last phone call: from mother i think.
last CD played: the lovers

Have you ever
have you ever dated your best friend: yes
have you ever broken the law: i suppose shinobi missions are a chargeable offence. so yes.
have you ever been arrested: no
have you ever skinny-dipped: no
have you ever been on tv: yes! when i was 14.
have you ever kissed someone you don’t know: nooooo

5 things you are wearing: an auntie-ish purple shirt with flowers and a peter-pan collar. topshop skinny jeans (with lycra!) a home-made charm bracelet. havaianas with monkeys on them. spectacles that make me look intellectual and credible.
4 things you done today: woke up. brushed teeth. took the bus. skived off work to go to breakfast.
3 things you can hear right now: doncha on class fucken 95. the clacking of my own typing. various colleagues coughing.
1 thing you do when you are bored: waste office resources with quizzes to update my blog

the not-so-intrepid photographer, zoot girlie-tron has sent photos and they are now up for viewing! there would be more, but then who has time to take a million photos when they're busy socializing? by the time we remembered to take pictures about half the people had left. but that's ok. we still got a nice group shot, as well as a lovely picture of sos cili.

somebody please buy me something from this website[link]

edit: bboj's sister is psychic. on behalf of uncle ong, i now own something kindof like this! but with sunflowers on it instead of bamboo. it was received the same day (christmas) that my grandma told me i needed a yellow bag to match my yellow shoes. huzzah.

holy family church confirmation class of 2000's 6th year reunion was a roaring success!! ROAR !! at about 5 or 6 zoot and i had a panic attack that nobody would turn up except us, leslie and winky. because out of all the people i notified, a grand total of 3 RSVPed =_= and in typical sg fashion, they were initially so enthusiastic about everything and then didn't turn up. and those who completely did not reply all turned up. phew ! talk about livin' on the edge.

anyway, zoot and i decided to play it cool (or kiasu), so we got to the place at 8, and hung about outside for smokes just to observe if anyone we knew was there yet. and then leslie calls at 10 past going "um...you guys coming in??" so we had no choice but to forge bravely on. and it was indeed the 3 of us till about 8.30. then winky arrived. and then everybody else trickled in and thusly my conservative target of 5 people was reached =D and THEEEN even more people turned up! and most stayed till midnight or 1-ish, which was very kind. and at 2-ish the management subtly told all their patrons to fuck off by switching the lights on. so we proceeded for supper and then went home. ta daa! you may all call me the queen of katong. first katong, then the world !!!

best turn-down for the evening came from someone zoot called (called S here, for Somebody)

Z: hey! lynette and i are organizing this mad reunion
S: OH. i can't go.
Z: um..huh?
S: because so-and-so will be there, and i can't go. i can't see him. he calls me all the time. if he's going i can't go.
Z: oh. but um .. he won't be there. lynette checked already. anyway it's on xx date at xx time.
S: oh. i can't go. i think i'll be away.

talk about avoidance.

but anyway it was great. and when zoot FINALLY uploads pictures, i will nick them to show them off to everyone.

happy birthday to the queens of hobbiton!

da left for china today. she will be gone for two monthses. oh deary me! how your meatpie babes will miss you.

*

in other news, i saw this flashing on a screen at the mrt station "do not seek to be a man of riches, but rather a man of value". wow. ok, thank you singapore mass rapid transit service for your pearls of wisdom that have changed my life forever.

* she's not really leaving on a slow boat to china, i think she left on an aeroplane. but doesn't she look nautical in this photo?

it is indeed a slow monday! everyone's either on leave or MC i really may as well go home, but i've been told that after lunch there will be some cadding for me to do. so anyhoo, after weeks of being completely braindead, i'm trying to get back into the swing of things, making wallpapers and cards.

here be attempt no. 1 .. personally not one of my best, but we're just warming up ladies and gents!



every morning on the way to work, i stand on the blue side along with all the other people walking from lau pa sat toward amoy street. it all seems very organized but once the light changes, all bets are off. some people even shed their inhibitions and *gasp* cross the line!! that's right! they don't follow the arrows!! HOW CAN ?!?! who says singapore is a nation full of conformist sheep?

muse plays in singapore on 16 jan. i leave on the 6th. tickets are CHEAP !! and i REEEEEEEEALLY want to gooooooooooo ...

now i must find out if i can change my flight out. ohhhhhhh man! muse!! i missed them in perf before, now i must catch them.

HOMIGOSH !! class 95 is playing a hives song as we speak !!!!!!!!!!!! they just saved themselves from certain death at the hands of an irate girlie ...... for today.

reason to love singapore #21: it is an educational place. you learn things you really didn't want to know about.

e.g. "i dun have body odour lor. i really dun have lor. jus now hor, on the train got army boy sit nex to me. smeow damn nice leh! den he smile at me. veh tense leh".
overheard at clarke quay train station from a girl with 2 really yukky tattoos on her shoulder blades. god, lady. nobody cares.

reason to love singapore #22: people glare at you if you try to be polite!!

e.g. "can i sit there?" GLARE
on a crowded bus coming back from shenton way. it was the only available seat, and it was being guarded by a man who wouldn't let anyone take the window seat.

one more month of class 95. can this poor heart take it ?!

in other news, i've lost my right contact lens =_= i took it out on sunday night and didn't wear them to work monday, and this morning i opened up the case to find *tadaa* only one contact lens. may i get a new one by next fursday!!

and finally, an open letter to the security guard who takes the 196 at 8.00am going toward lau pa sat .. YOU SMELL VOMITOUS!!! TAKE A SHOWER !!!

update: would anyone mind if i murdered vernetta lopez? it's either that or slitting my own wrists. radio djs make me want to die.

k at dinner last night: my mum asked me to teach her how to use skype. i told her "no need lah, you're very old". so she just looked at me for a long time then said "you are very fat".

and i thought my mum was blunt.

no sane person could have come up with a brand name like this

i got my first project! woot =D

first day of work ! it was ok. a bit menial. rearranging shelves that kinda thing. but no! i am not dead, just internet-less. and now wasting company resources =P

i have pics of the east-coast-walk-that-wasn't-meant-to-be and will post them asap !! and post about it asap too. as soon as i get used to not being shy about doing my own stuff while everyone else ignores me ..

hide all the idiots and lock up the uglies, singapore! stupid loser friends are hitting your hazy shores this summer.

happy halloween !!

hail britannia!!

little britain is coming to perrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrth !! on 22 feb 2007, matt lucas and david walliams will be here doing the little britain live show. and it will be great. tickets on sale 6 november and they will be expensive and stoo will have to purchase them because i will have no internet. and they will be so expensive but i would sell my left tit to get a ticket.

ok maybe not a tit. maybe a kidney.

harrrrr !! because stoo is the best, he bought me a life-sized captain jack sparrow cut-out. it is amazing and i love it and i hope he comes to life =D

also, lingling baked cake that was tasty as heck !! she is like nigella lawson + martha stewart without the massive tittays or the jail sentence.

dan from work is going back to poland in 5 or 6 weeks, and they're selling everything in their house. pool table, tvs, sofas the lot. so he invited us over to have a look at the remaining junk and look what i got !!

look at that antennae !! i don't even know what to do with it. dan's dad swears it works. we'll see. but i just think it's soooo coooool.

dan's dad: 25
me: 20
dan's dad: done. [to his wife] young girls nowadays are tricky.

i just got off the phone with the guy at the salon and i dont think i've been called "babe" so many times in one conversation. by anyone. ever. i didn't count but it went something like "what time babe? that's cool babe. see you soon babe". and it wasn't in a johnny bravo "hey baby" kinda way. this was a "hey girlfriend let's have a slumber party and give each other pedicures and gossip about boys" kinda thing.

so the question is: is it a pre-requisite for male hairstylists to be gay? flamingly or otherwise? and even if they declare that they "loves the women" like a certain taiwanese stylist once declared. it's still so dubious. so the poll for today is:

have you ever met a straight male hairstylist? yes no View Results Make your own poll

n.b. by hairstylist i mean your toni&guy or reds or supercuts guy. not your neighbourhood barber

what transpired between mother & stoo at 1.15pm:

hello cousin of my daughters, birthday dinner this sunday at 7.30 is that ok?

yes, daughter of my mother's mother. that is ok.

thank you, brother of my sister's son. will let you know details later.

nothing terribly significant .. i just thought it was funny that's all.

october is so birthday-ful!

*ask ann ann is a letters/advice column that appears in woman's day (or was it woman's weekly) here.
** that creature on the bottom is anne from little britain.

this is loooooong overdue but anyway tonight at dinner, dad randomly said to bashoo "you know, i don't know why but everytime i see you i think of sashimi". so here it is, bashoo! your extremely belated birthday card!

itadakimasu!!

look at all that booty!! [link]

thanks for the link girlie! this is toooo mesmerising =P

i have claimed my spot on the intarweb!
sheep suggested i claim my blog on technorati, so i have.

[stolen from other bunny's blog]

this is such a cool video. you've got to have real player to view it, but it's so worth it!!

courtesy once again of sheep! i dunno how she finds these links, but i think it has something to do with her being a blog-stalker net-savvy.

anyway the point is, how bourgeois can a person get? and is it really possible to shoot yourself in the foot while it's stuck in your mouth?!

so now she's shut down her blog (but someone else opened a new one under the same name), and deleted all pictures off her photobucket or something (although there are some pics of her still in circulation). i kind of feel sorry for her that people are making such lame arse threats and insulting her and her big mole and big bewbies n what not, but it's pretty dumb to make immature and uncalled-for insults when the very thing you are mad at her about is her immature and un-called blog post. isn't it ?!

people are just stupid. singapore needs some kind of population cull =P oh no! am i going to be embroiled in some kind of blogosphere scandal now ?!?! say it ain't so !!

i was feeling quite disgruntled for awhile, because so many people were getting the cleopatra/chinadoll/emily the strange haircut that i'd gotten last year and spent a whole year growing out. o the weary life of the trend-setting girlie =P

so anyway, i decided to chop most of it off and do something a bit different. and at the expense of getting ridiculed on my own blog, here it is !! hyuga hinata's haircut, the hiromi + lynnie loo version.



yes mun, i agree with you that i am a bloody otaku. and unshamedly so!

lasnite someone asked what "emo" meant, and i said "emotional, right?" and someone else said "nono, misconception. it actually stands for emotive core." oh. GAFFE !! so being inquisitive and whatnot, i wikipediaed it.

so it actually is short for "emotional hardcore" .. righto. so you learn something new everyday etcetc. so in the spirit of this post (if you haven't already seen/heard), then i present to you hopeisemo.

img courtesy of person whose signature is above the shoe. stolen from wikipedia because i cldn't b bothered drawing my own emo.

happy birthday guys! you make uni bearable

ok so andy's birthday was ages ago (on 7 oct same as my sweet cousin dar) but his birthday dinner was tonight, so technically this card isn't all that late. and yes i copped out by combining katie and andy's birthday greetings. so sue me. but i think it's still freakishly cute =P

and has anyone realized that there are so many birthdays in october ?!

happy birthday, you chao mugger

you know you have way too much time on your hands if you spend your days making lego abominations and other assorted projects. although you know i'm just saying that because i really wish that i was the one spending my days doing random silly things.

also, how cool is this project? i wonder if i have a doppelganger .. although meeting her would be a bit scary, and if your relatives see one it supposedly means that ill-fortune will befall you.

wa heeey! it's a war! well not just yet, but soon i think .. although i hope not. war is bad.

best bits from the article:

" the U.S. and Britain say most inspections of ships would be done at ports rather than on the high seas. Australia announced it was banning the North's ships from entering its ports, except in dire emergencies. "
what constitutes dire emergency? i dont really know what kind of business n. korea has with australia, or america or britain for that matter. kimchi trade? we can get that from south korea! or perhaps they are importing our fine australian minerals and agricultural produce.

" In a sign of Beijing's wariness about refugees, construction of a massive concrete and barbed wire fence along parts of its 880-mile border with the North has picked up in recent days. "
guys that's great. rest of the world be-damned, nuclear warfare o-kay! just please don't give us your tired, your poor or your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. oh. and you can keep your tempest-tost too. thanks. can you imagine the conversations? CHANG! the negotiations have failed! DIG FASTER!

" Today, we just sent a batch of agricultural tools to North Korea by truck," said Huang Kelin, manager of Wanshida Trading Co., a Dandong-based firm that has an office in Pyongyang. "
so scrap my idea of n. korea importing fine aussie produce. they seem to be growing their own! unless they melt down the tools to build shells for their b-b-bombz.

more commentaries should appear on mer & co. shortly, i think. we always have something to say!

ARGH !!
if google's bought over youtube, and google's taken over blogger, why can't i link youtube vids to my blog even though i've switched to beta ?!?!?! it makes no sense. google makes no sense.

anyway click here [link] to watch a completely mesmerising vid.

so leslie suggested we make a list of "top songs of the 90s" and then make a compilation cd out of our choices and swap. i thought it was a brilliant idea, and since we truly are children of the 90s - having starte formal education in 1991 and finishing in 2000 and all that - why shouldn't we have a list!

he's done his in a top 20 countdown kind of way, but i think i'll do mine chronologically .. not exactly in the year that they were released but definitely in the order that i remember listening to them in. it kindof makes sense that way. and also, some of these are way too embarrassing for me to rate as "favourites" so i don't really want to let you know how much i like them! shame on me. whatever.

it's like a game! match the band/singer/atrocity to their picture! this blog is so interactive
some are a dead giveaway =P

1. ice ice baby, vanilla ice
2. u can't touch this, mc hammer
3. black or white, michael jackson
4. shiny happy people, r.e.m.
5. dream lover, mariah carey
6. waterfalls, tlc
7. back for good, take that
8. get down, backstreet boys
9. buddy holly, weezer
10. you oughta know, alanis morisette
11. forgiven, alanis morisette (anthem of angsty catholic schoolgirls in the 90s the world over)
    
12. lake of fire, nirvana
13. wonderwall, oasis
14. killing me softly, the fugees
15. stand by me, oasis
16. walking on the sun, smashmouth
17. semi-charmed life, third eye blind
18. calcutta (taxi taxi taxi), dr. bombay (i actually really hated this song. but it got so much airplay!! )
19. enter sandman, metallica
20. orion, metallica (not exactly 90s but we jammed it a lot in the 90s!!)

oh look, more "shameless self-plugging" (as a certain somebody put it)! now that mer & co. has some kind of graphical representation, basic though it may be, i can advertise once again!

we're actually hoping to score a book or talkback radio deal. if anyone wants to offer us a spot on tv we wouldn't mind either =D the initial plan was to market ourselves as a

thinktank .. 9 voices, 3 continents, 1 vision.

not bad ah?

we're still sorting out kinks here and there such as who posts with what colour. but! if you start following now and bear with us, you can count yourself as one of the rare few who will be able to look down your nose at others and say, "oh, those guys from mer & co.? i knew them from way before they were famous and snorting cocaine off buff young men's/nubile young ladies' backs".

if my memory serves me correctly, it was dee who said that unless her husband was the one who got pregnant and did all the breast-feeding, she would never want to have kids. WELL THEN!! do i have some news for you ..

male lactation is possible !! according to wikipedia =P

anonymoose phriend (AP) was saying how his bahasa is so rusty and he is unsure of whether even if he wanted to, he would be able to have an indo partner. so i thought i'd give him a refresher course on the glorious language that is bahasa indonesia. being the kind caring and sharing person i am, i will now impart this basic knowledge to you also.

introducing yourself
hi! nama saya [insert name]

giving compliments
kamu cantik (you are pretty)
boobies kamu besar sekali (your personality is enchanting)

sealing the deal
mau bang bang? (would you like to have coffee with me sometime?)

and finally a message to indonesia on behalf of my island ex-home:

sister #3 has just got her wisdom teeth out - all 4 of them at one go - and she looks both hilarious and pitiful.

so picture this:

a forlorn figure appears at the door:

#1: are you um *snigger* ok?
#3: my fayth ith all thwollen. [pats cheeks]
#1: oh *sniggers more* is that why you've got the .. ice packed around your face
#3: it'th meant to keep the thwelling down ..
#1: um .. your tissue ..
#3: i'm meant to thpit into ti-thooth. i'm gonna get thum thoop now. am i bruithed?
#1: no .. no not yet.

mmm and i was going to put up the get well card i made for her. but i think i would never be forgiven, so i won't =P see?! cruel but not that cruel ... it's on flickr. because she says "it's ok if i don't see it" and she doesn't check my flickr.

any dream interpreters around? someone tells me what this means!

i'm waiting in my car for a friend to get something from the shops and these people pull up behind me and start bumping into the back of my car. so i move one spot forward and these 2 guys get out of their car. the driver just runs ahead, but the passenger is this fat malay boy who keeps running up to my car and kicking it.

so being the gentle girlie that i am, i get out of my car and start yelling at him to stop kicking my effing car fatman!! upon which he charges at me but instead of kicking me, he just throws this sweaty towel at me, which makes me freak out more.

and all this while my friend hasn't appeared from the shops yet. but another passenger seems to have materialized out of nowhere in the backseat and says "give me the towel", which i do. and he folds it into a diaper and gives it back to me.

then while the fat malay boy is still yelling i throw the towel/diaper at him and say something to the effect of "god, don't wet your pants about it you big baby", which makes him spontaneously burst into tears.

then i remember grinning at my passenger (unknown intellectual skinny-looking guy) and agreeing with his statement that he's indeed quite great.

so weird !!

for the past few weeks a few friends and i have been email-threading and we thought maybe people would like to read the stuff we're writing about. because we think it's funny and maybe you will too. it's mostly weird news and random comments, so click here to read stuff.

or for future reference, click the "mer-n-co" link in the side bar >>

ok i know said i was on hiatus. but i guess blogging is something to distract myself with ... so i guess hiatus is cancelled. heh =P

anyway a funny story from work today ...

this happened a few years ago when waffle hell just opened and the boss took all the staff on an outing. so they all went horse-riding, and before any of the horses even moved, boss jumps off the horse !! so someone asks
"um. why'd you do that?"
"because the horse did someone weird"
"how d'you know? have you ever ridden a horse before??"
"i did! in fact i rode a horse for 5 straight days from iran to afghanistan ... oh wait no. that was a donkey"
"WHAT?!"
"um. yeah. when i was a refugee"

exciting huh !! i knew they left iran to flee ayatollah khomeini and we've always kindof imagined him to be wielding a machine gun and blasting his way out. but a donkey! and he looks like super mario too. so this is roughly what it'd hv looked like:

to afghanistan!!

heh. i know i said i'd be away for awhile. but then i realized today was my yuppie cousin's birthday. so i thought i'd post a public shout-out + birthday card i made.

we will re-create the nostalgia at your next big family event. i promise.

we're going on a short hiatus. but if you still want those stickers let me know! email or something.

liana sent me this link. i think i've seen it before but stopped reading for some reason. anyway i really like this one.

bboj has asked for a "heart your neighbour m*th*rf*ck*r" sticker, and i know fortycalibernap wants one too. so anybody else? 8 more up for grabs. limited edition. leave a (nice) comment if you want one.

sheep and friends were curious what my MBTI was, so i took a jung test which is supposedly similar. they were just wondering if personality-type had anything to do with the people we hung out with, and apparently we are! mostly differing by only one letter. if that makes any sense.

edit: i did this other one tht sheep gave me before, but then the okcupid one seems a bit more thorough so i re-took it. same results! got images summore. all those peeps are ENFP too.

.
.
.

in other news, purgatory* is no more!

* for those of you who aren't catholic or haven't read a shakespearean play, wikipedia has a lovely entry on purgatory

how timely! just after sheepman's post, i found this in my inbox. it's a memo from an associate prof. at SMU to his students, reminding us why it's so useful to be bilingual in english and mandarin !

" Good morning my dearest students,

Over the weekend and up until this morning 10.00am I have the opportunity to review and comment on several students draft submission of assignment 3. I am very sorry to inform you that there are still room for improvement on the spreadsheet engineering aspect. Please kindly refer to the model answer provided. I am not try to "dick bones out of an egg" - a Chinese proverb, meaning that I looking for impossible. Together with this e-mail, I also enclosed two examples for your perusal. There are more examples in assignment 2.

Comply to specifications or requirements of your clients are very important in the real world practice. I am not going to be regretted if you angry with me or even graded me as a poor instructor if I marked you down. I have given students enough model answers and examples to refer to. You just need to change the can't be borded as long as my answer is correct attitude and be more careful on the requirements. It is not too difficult to comply. PLEASE! "

remember when il papa said that thing about the prophet mohammed that made everyone angry? and i mentioned something about his red prada shoes? anyway then i told zoot how funny it was that there's a movie called the devil wears prada and there is the pope wearing prada. and then zoot said how cool would it be if it were on a t-shirt. so then i wondered why i didn't think of doing this earlier.

i dont know why i can't embed youtube vids anymore. but anyhoo ...

a couple of weeks back, fortycalibernap sent me this link to a swedish chef video. some clever youtube-ing later, and i discover this guy's 14-minute swedish chef extravaganza !! it is amazing. børk! børk! børk!!

stoo just reminded me of this show we used to watch called the storm rages twice. it's set in lebanon and is quite arguably the worst soapie i've ever watched. and just so you know i'm not shitting you, here's some proof it exists !!

why do i bring this up? because stoo is currently watching the turkish version of the nanny called dadi, which he says is re-created pretty well except everything looks cheap. and mr. omer (aka mr. sheffield) has moobs.

boy from oz boy from oz boy from ozzzzzzzzzzz

marie was right! hugh jackman was hot enough to warm up burswood dome! no jackets required, ladies. so hot! so ambiguous !!

anyway if anybody wants to watch some more hugh "tasty" jackman goodness, check him out on enough rope with andrew denton re-telling his most hugh-miliating story and coming off looking great.

ok i'm over it. i swear.

once again sheepman has the latest news from the nanny state.

i don't see why people are so surprised that protesting was allowed in allotted spaces and only with police-approved placards. if anything i would have thought that wb/imf delegates chose singapore so they wouldn't have to deal with rabble-rousers. it's a bit like japanese porno. all the delegates go "yameru .. yameru .. don't be so harsh on the protestors" but at the end of the day it's still scripted and they still get paid. so it's really not that big a deal to them.

as for the banning of the far eastern economic review? i have nothing to offer you but a terrible pun: there is nothing to fear but f.e.e.r itself.

edit: i'm finally on blogger beta! hoo!

new banner ! dear blogger, please publish.

and now for something completely different ..

this is old and i dont know how many of you i've shown this to. but anyway it's somethingawful.com's international male catalogue fashion s.w.a.t. !!

no, sheep i don't feel guilty. but i do wonder what happened to him !! especially when i'm eating at hungry jack's.

me: burgers make me think of that tourist
mum: huh?
me: the carls jr. one. nothing in the papers about suicide in hotel room or anything
mum: oh. maybe his body's not been discovered yet because it's still floating off to sea somewhere
me: ... i guess that's the same positive outlook he had
mum: you can always count on me, my darling.

in other news...
"hello is mary there?"
"no. mary is not here. you've got the wrong number"

2 minutes later ...
"hello? mary?"
"no. there is no mary here. you've got the wrong number"

5 minutes after that ...
"hello? may i please speak to mary?"
"no. really you may not. because she probably gave you the wrong phone number"
*silence* "what number is this?"
"what number did you dial?"
"[recites number]"
"that's not mary's number. really."

today, after 19 hours have passed
"hello? mary?"
"for the fourth, and hopefully last time, i swear there is NO. MARY. HERE."

dear crazy old bat who keeps calling mum's phone,
just give up. mary hates you so she gave you a phony number. deal with it, move on.

woot! my first 1000 visitors!

ok that's all

the whole jesus camp/confirmation camp thing really got me thinking and sometime yesterday, zoot and i decided that we shuld have a reunion! so like any resourceful girlie would do, and hopped on friendster. now i may be terrible with details such as what events happened when, but i'm pretty damn good with names and truly, i surprised myself with how i could still remember who was in which clique!!

thusly, messages were sent out asking if anybody else was interested in a reunion and enough people answered to justify organizing it! oh i am happy. by sheer force of personality i will see this thing through, by jove.

so anyway, since singapore is so damn small and there's still about 15 people whom i can't locate on friendster, i bet someone reading this will have a brother whose ex-classmate's neighbour was a "graduate" of auntie paddy's 2000 confirmation batch. if you do, ask them if they would like to come to our reunion! or direct them to this blog and tell them to tell us their name and quest. and as much we'd love to invite your brother's ex-classmate's neighbour to our soiree, we'd really like to limit it to people who were in the same class as us.

jesus camp anyone?

how different is this from our confirmation* camps?! all i remember from ours was the guys sneaking out to buy cigarettes, terrorising other campers (sorry dean, no malice intended. it was just for a laugh), terrorising the teachers (sorry aloysius), boys and girls going 'steady' only to break up 3 weeks later, and of course the formation of the STUPID LOSER FRIENDS !!! all churchy activities were very calm sedate affairs more focused (i think) on making church fun so we all wouldn't stray, as catholic youth are wont to do.

there really is no point to this comparison, except that i find this jesus camp thing very alien.

* sacrament of confirmation

ladies and gentlemen, we have a band! so it's a concept band with no songs and only two members, but the cogs are in motion nonetheless. to quote my partner-in-crime...

stunt/fight coordinators are go!

we even have a myspace! http://myspace.com/stunt_monkeys

oh. my. gawd.

[new link]
check out longlostfriend leslie's blog o'er yon links panel. dude's done well for himself. if you're in sg go checkout his gigs.

[expansion of mr. miyagi's post]

on a lighter note, what the !! when adit was in sg earlier this year he did come across this place and ask what i thought DLV was. the sms thread went something like this

a: what do you think designer label vaginoplasty is?
me: stop shitting me. go away.
a: i'm standing next to this ad in parkway. there's a place on the 5th floor.
me: maybe they um ... monogram you
a: oh. must be.

postscript: while we're on this topic, here's a great finishing quote of the day.

sheep on why he/she shies away from political posts:
"oh...i shy away from them in case someone thinks i have "sand in my indian vagina" "

i don't know if any of you read, but richard hammond from top gear was in a bad baaaaad accident. i am so sad! bboj watches top gear for the cool cars, i watch it for the funny challenges and the hamster. he has good teeth =P

hear ye hear ye !!

i have found a chinese indiepop band !! the marshmallow kisses. who doesn't like marshmallows?? (harhar 40c) thank you last.fm!!

check out audioclips here or here

i am sick of univershitty! i want to earn $$ and go shopping .. anybody got a spare degree i can buy ??

*wails & gnashes teeth*

finally!! after 3.5 years of uni i have a piece of paper !! albeit a pretty useless piece of paper that qualifies me to do almost nothing.

and then when you see little miss phd with a thesis on"molecular mechanisms of iron transport by hepatocytes from a HFE knockout mouse model of hereditary haemochromatosis" and mr phd with a thesis on "molecular characterisation of the genes encoding the human Oncostatin M (OSM) receptor complex sub-units, OSM?R and gp130" it just makes you seem even more insignificant.

i swear some of those words are made up. but OH WELL. small consolation is, amongst the entire group graduating tonight, the ALVA students were decidedly best-dressed and least pompous of the lot.

and that concludes international talk like a pirate day*

* yes we're dressed like ninjas, but do note the pirate concession stickers!

he be no justin timberrrrrrlake, but t' opportunity for punnery be too good t' pass up !!

happy birthday me heartie!*

in other news, it be international talk like a pirate day so drink some grog and don't forget yer arrrrs yer scurvy bilge rats or you'll be tasting the cold metallic blade of a cutlass smartly.

* this lubber insists that naught shall know his name nor face.

read here, then see here.

if you were like me and just read google news without reading the speech, you'd have thought the pope really stepped his red prada boots in it this time. who the hell goes around dissing islam? apologies il papa! i thought you were almost 100% idiot! but now maybe only 50% =P

if you're going to say something with "Mohammed", "evil" and "inhuman" in the same sentence you're just asking for your words to be taken out of context, and i still think JPII wouldn't have made his point in such a, dare i say, sensationalist manner. but if you actually got past that one sentence you'd also see that he was promoting a dialogue of cultures.

so now there's anger spewing all over the place. protests in pakistan, militants in iraq vowing war (enjoy a career as an al qaeda militant! employee turnover rate may be high, but they always have vacancies), marching in indonesia (don't you have jobs?) etcetc .. i particularly like this article where a saudi newspaper purportedly said that the "remarks linking Islam to violence were beating the drum of war for the far right in the United States".

even if his intention was to denounce islam as evil and violent and inhuman (which it wasn't, i think), don't you think he would have been proven right? WE ARE SO TOTALLY NOT VIOLENT AND ANGSTY they cried as they burnt effigies and threatened holy wars.

marina mahathir (the famous dr. m's daughter) who writes a column for the star newspaper wrote this in may. and it's pretty true.

anyway i'm not going to the whole condemning islam thing because i don't, so please don't burn any effigies here. coming from singapore where the only people who smiled back at me during my smile experiment were the old malay aunties and uncles, i know it's only a few crazies who manage to stir the shit up where people have not much to do and don't have access to google news.

if i were the pope, i wouldn't be apologizing that i offended people. i'd be apologizing that the people who are offended are so goddamn stupid. oops. used the Lord's name in vain.

i'm not exactly into aussie politics, neither am i an expert on aboriginal affairs. so will somebody please explain just what this is all about? spit on my shoes and call me ignorant, but just how will a successful native title claim be a "fantastic opportunity for the state to open a new page in its relationship with the Noongar people" ?? i have no idea what the real implications are either. but it doesn't sound good to me at all. what happens with the local councils and everything? and just what do the noongar plan to do with western australia once they get it?

what good is it if you own the whole of western australia, when there are more serious problems to deal with in your own community especially in the rural areas?

according to this article the legal claim has been going on for three years. we've been here six and there's been nothing in the papers at all. and the results come out tomorrow? nothing in the west australian about it, and if i hadn't read the australian online today i wouldn't even have known! anyway mum doesn't reckon they'll win and i seriously hope not. i don't fancy being evicted from my home just because some abo from halls creek decides to make it his villa urbana.

kigurumi - tarako tarako tarako

something to drive you mad on a friday.

[stolen from sheepman]

see this guy? no wonder he's frowning.

woohoo! today is day !!

all i did was make one innocuous comment about how i dont have enough hanging space in my closet. which led to a tirade by my mother about how my room is too messy. which led to her conclusion that i need more hanging space in my closet ... =_="

so it kind of became like i didn't make any comments about the closet and it was all her idea so we are trooping to today.

so anyway, there's 2 reasons to love the swedes: the hives and

m?atb?lls anyone ??

" Hi samurai bunny - a wee message from FlickrHQ:
You have more than 200 photos in your photostream and you have a free account. That is excellent news, but, it does mean that you've hit one of the limits of your free account: only your most recent 200 photos will be displayed. May we draw your attention to the amazing benefits of a Flickr Pro account, and gently encourage you to upgrade your account? "

ARGH! this is as gentle as .. as .. i can't think of anything right now but this is certainly not a gentle encouragement.

so anyway .. is it worth it? hrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ...

pros:

• unlimited uploads
• unlimited sets
• unlimited photos displayed in photostream

but then do people actually look at 200 not-recent photos? and therefore is it worth it to get a pro account just because of this? hmmmmmm quandary !

i'm sure i'm not the first person who's thought of this. but i haven't read/heard of/spoken to anyone else who wants to do this, so i document it here. and remember! you (may have) read it here first!!

but anyway. i want to go on a haruki murakami tour of japan. as in follow the trails of his characters from 1 or 2 books. it should be fun right?

gosh um ... how do i put this delicately ...

you're an idiot.

today's programme has been brought to you by lynnie loo (吕), njstar communicator, and a mug.

吕*

传说中国上古时期共工有一个侄孙名叫伯夷。他曾辅佐尧掌管四岳，后来有协助大禹治水立了大功，尧帝就任命他为视官，制订出一套维护尊卑的视法制度伯夷因功而封于 「吕」这个地方，他的子孙世代为诸侯，历经、虞、夏、商、周前近二千年，到春秋时，吕国被楚国所灭吕国的工族为代就以国名姓，形成了最早的吕氏。周武王征伐朝时的主帅姜子牙，就是吕国工族子孙。

历史上著名的吕氏名人有三国名将吕布。「三英战吕布」的故事至今仍为津津乐道。

.

.

and now in english. if there are errors it'd be good if someone corrected me =P as i said before my mandarin is quite appalling.

“ Legend has it that in ancient times, there was a man named Bo Yi (pronounced buo-yee), who once assisted in governing Si Yue (Four Mountains?). Later on he did a smashing job in assisting King Yu in regulating waterways and was conferred the title of minister and given the title to a placed called “Lu”. His descendants were feudal lords of this land for almost 2000 years until the spring-autumn period (i’m guessing this is some kind of historical reference), when Lu Country was invaded and destroyed by Chu Country. This was when the people of Lu Country took on the surname “Lu”, and became the first Lu Clan. Jiang ZiYa is a famous Lu descendant.

Another historically famous Lu descendant is Lu Bu, whose story still thrills and brings joy to people. ”

* in pinyin this is pronounced as Lǚ

it's been a few weeks now since i seriously started listening to some chinese music, and i'm struck by how everything is so pop. either they're very obscure and i'm not looking hard enough, or no such thing exists. but then i've never heard of chinese indie music. the only proper chinese band i know of so far is 五月天, which is really sad. so anyway, i've decided i should try to fill that niche. together with dear stoo and whoever else decides to volunteer, i'm going to try and create a chinese indie/rock band.

of course, first i have really improve my mandarin. at the moment i find it difficult to string together proper sentences let alone compose a song or something. but baby steps !! learning to crawl before walking and running etcetc.

i refuse to believe that chinese music listeners are so devoid of taste that they only ever want to listen to the rainie yangs and ... whoever else it is that people listen to.

also, i refuse to believe that chinese songs can only be about
我爱你，
你爱她，
回来吧，
我为何振扎?
这个感觉到多么可怕*

anyway this whole getting in touch with your roots thing has gotten me really curious about my family. stoo and i always joke about having a family crest whenever we see that shop in the city (the one that creates a family crest for you based on your surname. applicable to caucasians only), so i decided to find out the origins of my own family name.

dad has this mug with a big 吕 on it, along with the origin of the surname in 繁体字, which i can't really read. so anyway i'll type it up here some other time (tomorrow perhaps) with a translation. from what i gather, we were some type of royalty!

for now though, it's off to bed!

* original composition by me. although i'm pretty sure there exists a song out there with all those lyrics in different permutations.

this is kindof an air-headed post but anyway ...

lately many guy friends have been bemoaning the lack of suitable female companionship. maybe it's because the nature of our uni life is such that we really are reclusive and don't get out much to meet new people. or maybe they're introverted. but still, asking someone out is something that guys are expected to do all the time. even if it's for coffee or just talking or something, guys are always expected to make the first move, and it's not very fair!

maybe girls think that if they ask a guy out the guy's ego will be so inflated he won't fit in his chair anymore. but i don't think that's the case! i think your average nice-guy generally lacks the little testiclé required to make the first move, and if the female of the species put their best foot forward and talked to someone that she thought looked interesting, the boys would be much happier.

not trying to defend or put down one or the other. it's just an observation and i'm just saying.

CRIKEY!

steve irwin was punctured by a stingray ?! that's too unfortunate .. and more than a little shocking. i mean the guy pretty much hurled himself at crocodiles and came out unscathed. and this time he just swims around a bit and he's dead? and so young too .. not just age-wise but with young kids and everything.

oh dear .. this is pretty sad. but at the same time it's kind of apt. he's the type of person you can't imagine dying of old age.

anyway it's late and i'm a-ramblin'. the point of this is that i just wanted to say R.I.P. you crazy ocker man.

you have 1 hour and 15 mins of fathers day to do something nice for your dad.

okgo!

today at mass the choir sang this song entitled "telephone to glory" and i burst out laughing. in the middle of mass. just before communion. and i couldn't stop. i'm surprised nobody doused me in holy water. but i felt kinda bad because there was this sweet old lady next to me who was singing along quite happily. so i had to think about someone dying just to make myself feel a bit more solemn.

anyway, the song was horrendously cheesy and i really wished zoot was there because she would have laughed right along with me and i wouldn't have had to look heathen all by myself. but then again, mum did a double-take when the saw the lyrics and i'm pretty sure i saw her biting her lip to keep from laughing herself.

and after mass we had to scuttle out of church because i'm pretty sure everyone saw my heaving shoulders and heard the muffled snorts and giggles.

edit: i have since learned that the glorious telephone song is also an old jazz/blues song. however, i still maintain that it is silly, and that a barbershop quartet-type rendition is not appropriate for Roman Catholic mass, unless the intention is to have the congregation in stitches.

the book i'm meant to be reviewing is on New Urbanism, which also goes by the name of Neo-Traditionalism.

i think when it comes to portmanteau (we learned this word before, remember?) and -isms*, the architect is king/queen/lord and master, especially for -isms that aren't easy to decipher at first glance. what a pompous esoteric lot we are.

also, like i said stu's present FINALLY arrived in the mail! after 9 weeks of waiting. so of course it had to be delivered asap*.

i'm glad he likes it !

also, a certain somebody introduced me to the works of marten baas. i like! i want. take note of the toxic yellow chair under "treasure furniture". MDF = Medium Density FUN ?!?!

* n.b. hopefully one day i will have my own -ism. CUTE-ism. and you will all love it or else.

* stoo + ben's presents were ordered in the midst of hard gay mania. i think it's kinda dying down now, but still u gotta admit it's a funky present.

IT HAS ARRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVED

jubilation !! and all that jazz. i will post pictures of this mysterious IT after it has been delivered to its rightful owner.

[makes happy noises that temporarily replace the wailing and gnashing of teeth that accompany the essay i'm supposed to be pulling out my arse right now]

oh look! it is past midnight, and my flickr upload limit is once again at 0%!

the first few are from the strokes concert that was a few weeks ago, but then we didn't take that many photos. mostly because there was either nothing on stage, or the strokes on stage. and when the strokes were performing, taking photos kinda took a backseat to jumping around.

the rest of the photos are just stupid ones from stuie's beer&moustache party.

also, many deadlines to meet but then my sleeping patterns are super screwed up. so before i finally actually go, here's a motivational poster!

you may recall the first version of this .. well i figured i'd take it one step further and print out version 2 to put in studio/my study. perhaps gazing at it will inspire amazing fantasmic work.

edit: it's so annoying how you can't change the order of your photos in flickr =_= i forgot and uploaded my strokes pictures in (what i thought was) chronological order but is in fact reverse chronological order and now they're all reversed (except for the one in the middle) *breathe* ARGH! damnation.

happy merdeka to all malaysian readers!

as if you all needed to procrastinate more (although i admit i procrastinate the most), here's yet another comic for you to read!

nothing much happened today, but i did get told a couple of funny things that i thought i'd share. to distract you all from the lack of substance you'll notice i added colours =P

at lunch ...

stoo: audrey said this girl at her mum's school came in wearing nothing but a short jumper and tights.
me: um. so?
stoo: and no pants.
me: um. eew. skirt?
stoo: nein.
me: skank! that's nuts.
stoo: she said "yeah but all the other girls are doing it too". but they had pants on. or a skirt.

and on msn

" B* :
today my officer walk by me to collect a print out at the printer beside me and asked me why i was laughing to myself

B :
or smiling to myself actually

B :
and that it creeped her out

:: stupid loser girlie :: are you in the punjabi hit squad ?! says:
n then ?

B :
i couldnt say ecause i actually painted the black mouse of the clerk beside me with the black marker

:: stupid loser girlie :: are you in the punjabi hit squad ?! says:
n then ?! his hand was al black ?!

B :
and he [the guy] was like so serious he didnt notice. then she [the officer] kept saying stop smiling to yourself you are freakin me out then i couldnt help it i burst out laughing

:: stupid loser girlie :: are you in the punjabi hit squad ?! says:
oh no u r such a weirdo

B :
then at the same time the clerk went "ah! my hand!"
but my officer didnt get it so she went back to her desk creeped out

B :
but i couldnt laugh cause its the office

:: stupid loser girlie :: are you in the punjabi hit squad ?! says: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that's mean

:: stupid loser girlie :: are you in the punjabi hit squad ?! says:
can i put that in my blog

B :
sure =) "

so that's why it's here.

* name has been changed to protect the person involved

mitch hedberg is funny. in one of his shows he asks where sesame seeds come from. you get some stuck to big macs, they get turned into oil, invoking the great name of sesame opens stuff, and it's also a street. but what is a sesame ?! i posed the question to the dinner table last night and nobody knew.

aged auntie: it grows on a tree. a sesame tree.
no it doesn't =_=

ordery: it's like a fruit. and you crack it open and all the seeds spill out. like .. a seed fruit. thing.
lies.

so anyway, once again wikipedia saves the day, and all's right with the world.

oh my! it is my retorded cousin's birthday !!

happy buh-buh-buhrthday man ! th'art the best cousin a girlie could ever hope for.

heya, can anyone help translate this puh-lease?

"日本?政公社「配?完了ｅメ?ル通知サ?ビス」をご利用いただき

ありがとうございます。

受付を致しました?便物の配?状?の?果についてご?告致します。

【受付日?】 07 月 25 日(火) 23:56
【受付番号】 XXXXXXXXXX
【お?合わせ番号】 XXXXXXXXXXXXX
【追?システム?果内容】 07 月 03 日 11 ? 27 分 ?便物の配?完了が追?期?中に??できませんでしたので、お近くの?便局へお?ねください。
（EMSについては、本サ?ビスを提供していない国がありますので、ご了承ください。）

※配?完了ｅメ?ル通知サ?ビスは、送信?用アドレスで送信しております。
このメ?ルに返信されても、受信できませんので、ご注意ください。"

ohhh item from japan (that can't be disclosed here lest recipient finds out what it is) .. why do you elude me so.

you know that thing that everyone (well ok, mostly i) like to do? where you combine 2 or more words into one really long funny word? it's called a portmanteau.

that's all really.

ok go!


tim nordwind luv!

and a whole bunch of other vids here

wah. two useless posts in one day.

this sketch by jasonshogreen is really cute. but it reminded me of the depressed tourist at carl's jr. last year. the one who said "y'all love american burgers" to nobody in particular and left without touching his meal. i hope he's ok.

mark your calendars folks! i will be terrorizing south east asian soil from 4th november till 6th jan.

Your walk is: Pirate-esque Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

moo i dont know what's wrong with the .gif file, but as you can see, my walk is pirate-esque! although sometimes i think it's less johnny-depp-pirate and more vcd-pirate =P

confession: these chinese songs are growing on me. 五月天 (mayday) is actually quite a tight band ! but then i my computer doesn't read chinese file names, and neither does my itunes. so all the song titles read "squaresquaresquare" =(

anyway, my birthday is in about 2 months time. 2 months and a bit to be precise. sooooo anybody wanna get me 五月天 cds ?!

and who'dve thunk i'd listen to chinese music ?!?! o well, might as well embrace my heritage =P

and no, hell has not frozen over!

p.s. guan you is cuuuute =D

dont know how many of you actually read marriedtothesea. it's usually funny and always bizarre. but today's is especially chortle-worthy!

hey guys! video nite at sheepman's!

edit:
or else, check out the pictures at the andynator's (wikkiwikkiwow!) the fine arts dudes finally produced something decent looking! as opposed to the creepy shit they sometimes come up with. yes mr. half-shorn-latex-body-parts-sculpting-and-mutilating-man, i'm talkin' to you.

n.b. i realize i look quite terrigible but gimme a break yo, some peoples were at uni a veeeery long time. thunderthighsahoy =_=

so all of a sudden i have this craving for pistachio macaroons. they are so tasty! if only i had a macaroon fairy to conjure one up in whatever flavour i desired =P

o, putrid-looking-green-cookie-that-actually-tastes-really-good .. how i miss thee!

<

does anyone know where to get these in perth ? short of making them myself that is .. i'm no nigella lawson.

happy birthday, bboj!

actually his birthday was yesterday but i spent the whole day at uni ... so this is a day late in posting, although he did get a present! so i am not completely terrible =P

in other news, what's going on with blogger? is google taking over the world ?!?!

what have i learned from ATR so far? the golden section/rectangle/ratio can be applied to just about anything. like iPod for example! the proportions up to the tip of the screen form a golden section, and the centre of the dial = the centre of the square that forms the base of the golden section*.

see, iPods r cLasSy.

* it was not me who thought of applying it to the iPod .. i was merely carrying out someone else's idea. so while that in itself is pretty nerdy, i am NOT, i repeat NOT a completely hopeless case.

wow .. just .. just wow ...

courtesy of mein cousin, check out this store! it has sleepwear, sportswear, t-shirts* .. and all other kinds of um .. garments.

no cover front & back can tear clip bikini anyone?

* sorry i'm not home right now i'm walking in a spider weD. *chortle*

being a wee waffle monkey who only works one shift a week, i told myself i'd only purchase one item of clothing this semester and save as much moolah as i can for my trip to singapore at the end of the year.

THIS is that one item of clothing! and it's finally on auction in my size!!!!!!!!!! ever since darryl hannah wore this coat :

in kill bill vol. 1, i've been pining for something with a belt printed on it, and this one has a belt and pleats and the whole shebang!

bidding ends in 6 days ... if it's meant to be*, then the price won't have gone up by that much and i will be the proud owner of this dress.

* this is the shopping karma theory i have btw.

the ultimate betrayal ...

is when your sister starts singing along to the worst song ever in the history of a band, after agreeing that it is indeed the worst song ever in the history of a band - not just ONCE, but MANYMANY TIMES in the car, in the queue, and at other various points while waiting for the gig to start.

BEDROOM SCENE

here's a music video for some guy called bedroom scene, directed by some other guy called dick thompson. i don't know those other guys are but the song is catchy and the video is nice!! and i just found it because one of the girls (tombflower) is the gf of the guy who created lenore, the cute little dead girl (roman dirge). not to be mistaken for the other guy who wrote about lenore first, and on whom the comic one is based on.

oh strokes, you did not disappoint us one bit! fab + nikolai are cute and it was just fantasmo =) a small part of my brain is panicking like crazy because the deadlines still haven't gone away, but i can't hear the alarm bells sounding because of the ringing in my ears.

the crowd was kindof shove-y even though the moshpit was only two-thirds full, and stupid underaged skanks kept trying to push their way to the front. but! the little miss loos aren't ones to be pushed around, hence many "accidents" befell them [evil laughter]

and thank god for stripey-shirted-mosh-pit-saviour-guy who helped us escape tramplings many-a-time. photos will have to be procured from various members of our posse but they will be up asap! now excuse me while i go wash other people smell off me!

wee hoo it's national day in singapore! if you want to give a gift to singapore, you may go here. but i do suggest having a sickbag handy. sheepman has nice national day vid you may like to check out.

also, since you know it's national day and we're away in another country *koff*quitters*koff* i was just thinking about the motherland and wondering why she calls herself the republic of singapore. technically she is, i mean there's elections but then most of those are walkovers and then we all know who's going to win so it's not really a competition (just like australia at the cricket), it's just a chance to wave their balls at the opposition and laugh. but then also it's not entirely an oligarchy because two people from the same family don't really count right? but perhaps this is only the beginning of an era. and maybe you can say dictatorship but that word is completely taboo and if i even say the word "tartar" i'm pretty sure somebody will threaten my family. so how? there's not an exact word to describe the state of government right now, so i'm creating one: repolitatorship. the repolitatorship of singapore. all in the spirit of combining 2 - or even 3 ! - names to indicate a union! brangelina, spederline, infotainment, edutainment, REPOLITATORSHIP! i think it has a certain ring to it.

it's not that singapore necessarily needs to be called a republic of something something because everyone just says "singapore" anyway. but maybe having an officially long long name helps cover up the fact that the country is a small small place? and "repolitatorship" has 6 whole letters over "republic", not to mention twice as many syllables.

although judging by some of the other countries on the list of republics, maybe people know it's all kind of a sham .. afterall it's all just words anyway right?