today was dennis' birthday, so we got him a cake and told him he absolutely had to come to uni today. in true dennis fashion, he got absolutely wasted last night, passed out at a friend's house, and then came to uni as soon as he woke up for our mini-celebration.


you see? even random strangers pray for him and his liver.

also, it was malaysia's birthday. as i dressed up on national day in singapore's national colours, linda also dressed for merdeka. to support her, i wore my singapore colours too (although you can't really tell because today was VERY cold. totally inappropriate for patriotic chesty bonds tank tops). we south-east-asians must stick together.

brief (and mostly inaccurate) history lesson:

singapore used to be part of malaysia, but then one day said "fuck it" and left. either that or malaysia said "fuck you hippies" and kicked us out.

ever since then, the two countries have had a love-hate relationship. malaysia sells us water, we refine it and sell some back to them. whenever they get angry they will say "we cut off your water supply and you will all die". so we retaliate by kicking their butts at soccer and then secretly recycle our wee and call it NEWater so in case they really do, we won't die. they criticise our totalitarian government and publish books by singaporean exiles and misfits just to irritate the powers that be*. and then we have extravagant national day celebrations to subtly say "my balls bigger than your balls, donch pray pray". two seconds later, singaporeans will take advantage of the national day long weekend to run to JB and stock up on toilet paper, and while they are in JB, some armed robbers will hijack their mercedes benzes and offset the amount saved on toilet paper.

kind of childish.

so linda and i have decided to make a difference, and by our friendship, encourage other singaporeans and malaysians to be friends too.



afterall, neighbours should be there for one another, because that's when good neighbours become good friends.

*conspiracy theory

stoo's birthday card

courtesy of ninja girlies

happy birthday retarded cousin stoo!!

i [heart] you!


blackmail-worthy pic of me and stoo circa 1985

i realize i was slightly inconsiderate last night with this ninja post. the background story is that one night, stu and i decided we wanted to go a-stencilling, and for some inexplicable reason, also decided that being stencilling ninjas was the way to go.

you can read all about it here [link] in the14th may post.

shinobi mission #2 has been successfully executed. no arrests or deportations were made.



hot damn we are sexy ninjas!

stoo's birthday's coming up, so there's the preparations for that. and then there's also studio stuff. so blogging shall take a backseat for awhile. check back on monday and there will be a new post! promises!

oh. and i also made some changes to the links under the "blogs from all over" section. if you'll notice, not only have i put them in alphabetical order, but i've also culled some so what remains are blogs i actually read myself.

it's model time! but first, some cake. and a shower. mmm .. cake shower.

so many posts in one day can only mean one thing: one very bored, unmotivated and procrastinatey girlie.

girlies may be silly and whimsical, but all the feather boas in the world can't mask the fact that we are not made of stone.

a long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, a girlie sent in a forgotten password request to flooble chatterbox. impatiently, she checked her inbox every 5 minutes to see whether it had been sent. alas, after an hour of neurosis, she gave up. meanwhile, she was typing in every username and password combination she had ever used in her internet history and after what seemed like an eternity, got the winning combination. you'd think they'd give her a prize (although..who asked girlie to be so stupid and forget her username and password in the first place. duuuuuur *rolls eyes*)

anyway, the point of this entry is that i wanted to show you all. after a trillion squillion days .. after we've gone past the point of me being peeved that my password was never sent to me, and completely forgotten that day ever happened, i receive this:



twice no less. ok so i clicked the button thingy twice. but talk about lag! congratulations flooble !! i'm surprised the tags on my tagboard don't appear 2 months after they've been posted. although, that would give this blog a twilight-zoney kinda feel.

nothing exciting happening lately. seriously..nothing. nada. *miserable* only studi-poo. for 5 weeks we haven't had anything to do, and all of a sudden rob says "hey goys, let's come up with two concepts boy mondye roight? roight" .. *shakes fist*

on the bright side though, only 12 more days to charlie and the chocolate factory!! 12 days !!
FINALLY!!! our moment as arrived .. goddamn, australia's slow. cheap bastards *rasher*frasher* they probably bought the movie late so they'd get the bargain bin discount price on it. while the rest of the world is busy savouring a tasty johnny, we have to wait 2 months ... stuie reckons the oompa loompas will give him eternal nightmares because he is that traumatised from when deep roy (the oompa loompa they cloned) was the badlaa on x-files. i know a few people who'd be first in line to get tickets though. besides me and linda =P

nothing exciting happening = no updates. however, i've dug up a picture that lynne took one night at dinner.

lukewarm off the press:

there was a protest in singapore!! in front of the CPF* building no less. and of course, it was perfectly legal because less than five people participated thereby disqualifying it as an illegal assembly. 2 of the protesters were members of singapore's opposition party, and while the leader of the opposition party was in the vicinity also, he said he was only there to sell his book.

here's a link to an article on this big event.

i'd link you guys to the story according to the straits times but unfortunately, you have to pay to read it online, and who wants to do that?!

anyhoo, several things are funny about this. according to the straits times, this 4-person protest was broken up by police. what they forgot to mention was that it was broken up by riot police. fully equipped no less. dude, that's just sad. and don't even allow the "we live in an age of paranoia and terrorists" thought to cross your mind, because these protestors were in home-made t-shirts and wielded cardboard signs. all they wanted was greater transparency from government linked companies, which is in itself a big ask considering the country in question.

very surprised that singapore even has an opposition party, ironically and aptly named the singapore democratic party. you can bet it's government-approved opposition though, because if they send riot police to break up a deadly, chaotic crowd of four people, what would they think of a guy who actually runs a political party who could possibly *shock*horror*gasp* maybe-if-you-imagine-very-hard take over the country *snigger*. silly buggers.

and this poor opposition team leader. emperor dowager lky gets memoirs published in 2.7 pounds of hardcover (used and new, going on amazon.com from USD$13.48) and mr chee soon juan has to:

a) get his book published by a malaysian publisher (probably cheaper), and then

b) can't get shops in singapore to sell his book, so he has to hawk it on the streets. kindof like a vcd pirate but with autographed copies of his latest book about "effecting political change in singapore through non-violence" ($USD 8.13) **

c) when he launched this book, plain-clothes policement were filming the event for "investigation". give the guy a break! how is he going to instigate anything when barely anybody went for the launch in the first place?

poor thing right?

if you ask me though, it seems like a very poorly choreographed puppet show. how quaint that he should be plugging his book in the same vicinity, on the very same day as this faux-test. then the riot police arrive yelling "freeze, assholes!", and he's like "but it was non-violent! wherefore do you cock your rifle at me, dear sir?" then his book title is so convenient.

maybe he rented the riot police for a day since all these people are at a loose-end after national day hootenanny is over. who knows?

dear mr chee, if you want a publicity stunt, let me make a suggestion:

one day, go hawk your wares outside an mrt station with a large bag full of your books, and then those poor NSmen on terrorist patrol will see you and point their rifles at you yelling, "drop the bag, muthafucka!!" and you will make a fumbling attempt to do so, but then your actions will be seen as trying to make a run for it. so they will pull the trigger several times several times. HOWEVER, because their rifles are not actually loaded, they will yell "BANG! BANG!" and you can pretend to keel over, while making groaning noises. then as you drop to the ground, your bag will spill open and your books will scatter like so many petals in the wind, and people will pick them up and tut-tut about what a brave and non-violent man you were.

[applaud]

*CPF = Central Provisional Fund. it's government-run superannuation.
** heehee i also can be a journalist. this book only has 135 pages so of course it's heaps cheaper.

rots of ruv,
your semi-negligent-peach-flower-blossom-sweetie-pie-who-is-making-your-birthday-card-as-we-
speak.

your present will arrive at your doorstep in about week's time.

today's national day in singapore! for the uninitiated, singapore's national day commemorates the day that she gained independance from malaysia. for many singaporeans and expats alike, it's pretty much just another holiday. only this one has a big drama. NSmen train for aaaages (and i mean abso-fricken-lutely aaaages) with the marching, and the logistics, and the parachute display and the flight formations, and the fireworks, and the driving of their tanks and all that kinda thing. it's a real "yo dude, check out my balls, ain't they fancy" shebang. and then there's the school children of all ages dancing to singapore-songs with bigger and fancier displays than the year before. and flash-card displays (to singapore-is-my-home music of course). that being said though, it is quite entertaining, and with singapore being so small, you can pretty much see the fireworks from anywhere (this i am assuming because i've always lived in the east and the parade's held very near the east) .. and these fireworks aren't just any pissy ones. they're really extravagant razzle dazzle numbers. they make perth's australia day fireworks look like cheapo chinatown sparklers. fancypants.

also, from what i've heard and read, taufik's (singapore idol winner) the singer of this year's national day song. him and some other chick, and it's really annoying because they've been playing the music video ad nauseum on tvmobile. in recent years the songs have gotten heaps better. there's still the really old school ones doing the rounds (stand up for singapore! one people, one nation, one singapore! etcetc). i really used to like those .. but then again i was 3 and extremely easily entertained. they used to play them on tv karaoke style with blue skies, fluttering flags, children of all 4 major races holding hands and playing in hdb playground .. but nowsadays they get actual proper pop stars to record it so as to gain popularity and win the hearts and minds of the people.

i know lots of people want to run away from singapore, come to australia! dont need to pass chinese to get into uni! go to anywhere-that-you-don't-have-to-pay-$1million-for-a-toyota-camry! and it's true that school in singapore's a major downer. according to dee, every uni exam is like taking a levels all over again (not that i sat for those btw). the shopping's cheap but transport prices are starting to become daylight robbery. property is shockingly expensive, and in terms of a tropical getaway, it's pretty well So Expensive and Nothing TO See Also (volcano world? fail) but it's still stupid loser friends homebase, and there's still family and friends there that make me want to go back and visit at least once a year. not to mention the food is cheap and good and dirty (occasionally).

so anyhoo, in honour of the country of my birth, i wore my i heart singapore shirt to uni today! home-made summore. 'coz i heart singapore with (almost but not quite) all my um ... heart.

as promised, here is the love story of samuraibunny and bboj *flutters eyelashes*makes a cute face* . it even has a disclaimer right about now saying: WARNING!! extremely long post ahead. thou hast been warned.

getting on with the story ...

i had just finished grocery-shopping and was walking toward the bus-stop to catch a bus home. however, from a distance i could see that the bus had just pulled into the bay about 100m away. so for some inexplicable reason, i decided to run after the bus instead of waiting for the next one. maybe it was because i wanted to give my mentally retarded sister *koff* her kinder surprise as soon as possible .. i had worked so many overtime hours just to buy her that chocolate!

however, silly delicate me tripped on air and fell over, scattering the contents of my bag all over the sidewalk. oh me, oh my! the kinder surprise! its elliptical shape was perfect for rolling away from me! how torn i was!! was i to save all my other groceries from being trampled on by passers-by, or chase down that chocolate that symbolized hours of sweat and tears and love.

luckily, bboj made that decision for me.

he stuck out his toe and gently stopped the kinder surprise from rolling any further, and picked it up for me. "here," said he, "i'll help you gather your stuff and carry it all home even though it's completely out of my way". it was a very tear-jerking moment. so carried away with emotion was i that i could hardly stop my hands from trembling long enough to open the door, or to unwrap the chocolate i had bought. so bboj helped me do all that. he even helped my sister put
together her kinder toy .. what a sweetie!

from that moment on, we spent as much time together as we could. not all have been warm and sweet though. there was the time his demented grandmother threw herself down the flight of stairs and blamed me, when how could i have committed such a heinous act? my arms are so delicate and weak that i can't even lift them to mop my brow in extreme heat! and then there was the time that we had to rush to hospital to get the crayon removed from my sister���s nose, but then we lost each other in the meandering hospital corridors. luckily we managed to locate each other eventually. traumatising.

and then the biggest test of all! i am here in australia typing shit stories, and he is in singapore waiting for NS!

however, our lurve continues to blossom and soon my little hum cheem peng* and i will be reunited once again to fill the gaps between each others��� fingers.

just the beginning ...

* hum cheem peng is a deep-fried ball of dough with red bean paste in it. salty yet sweet, tasty and unhealthy! go singapore! majulah singapura !!

i've just realized that my first anniversary with ben's come and gone, and not a word on this blog's been said about it. shocking! appalling even. so i thought to commemorate this milestone of long-distance-relationshipping, belated though it may be, i will tell the story of our love. afterall, how can this blog be left behind while everybody else and their dog is telling the world about how in lurve they are with their honey-baby-schnooky-pants?

watch this space folks, for verily i tell you, a story of love shall unfold.

the hives [link] !! they come to perth !! and we're going !! *joy*rapture*dancing*fanfare* by we i mean stoo, order-y, me, linda + miscellaneous (i.e. dunno who else) .. just look we're on their list !!



although they do play one day only on the monday of folio week. but i endeavour to be done by then .. judging by the amount of work rob has given us so far, i don't think things will get much busier..i hope.

on a completely different note, ben googled the phrase "hit me with your rhythm stick" (ref: previous post) and unearthed this little gem [link]. seems like a kick arse song, just by looking at the lyrics i can tell! i'm so going to find it and listen to it.

* apologies about the proliferation of exclamation marks. girlies are excitable because the hives us the shimmy shivers

happy 20-somethingth birthday nick!!



* please note, this is nick's real birthday, not a concocted one like linda and i joke about planning for ourselves